The Gospel According to Cats

I am trying to leash train my cat.

Don't ask.

No, really, there just isn't a good explanation. Trust me.

She was quite calm and compliant as I put her in the harness, but the mood changed dramatically when I set her down on the floor. She frantically crouched down and crawled backwards trying to get away from the leash. I suspect she figured that if she got into the harness head first, she must have to back out of the thing.

It was hilarious. Okay, now we see the real reason behind my trying this.

I didn't get hissing or growling, but I didn't get purring either. Walking with the leash didn't happen but she did explore outside for a bit. Curiously, she spent most of the leash time sitting on my lap. Normally this cat is not a lap cat; as she generally prefers to sit on my shoulder.

All in all, it went well as I got only one dirty look. We may try it again in the future.

I suspect she sat in my lap because she didn't feel safe with the unfamiliar. The ironic thing is she was safe because of the leash.

I was involved in a strange face book conversation where a participant insisted that God acted immorally when He granted us free will, because He knew we would get ourselves into trouble and cause pain and suffering in the world.

That was a first. It sounds like the circular reasoning of a child: "You knew I was going to hurt myself when I fell off the slide, so why didn't you stop me from breaking the rule about not standing on it?"

In fact, I think I heard a kindergartner say that once while I was putting a bandage on his knee. My response: "Go and stand on the slide, no more."

I like to let our cat out into the backyard every now and then. There is so much entertainment there for both of us. I know that being outside is not safe for cats so I put her on a leash. She doesn't happen to know it is possible to be outside without a leash so she adapts and enjoys the smells, sights and sounds she finds outside. She has a little bit of free will, with a whole lot of loving safety.

Think about our confusion regarding freedoms and expectations. God does not put us on a leash, but He does give us His law for our own safety. We certainly can't earn our way to heaven by following the law, that bus has already left the station. However, following the law will result in the blessing of a happier life. Even though we chafe against the law and try to back out of it, we know it is a loving good thing from the heavenly Father who cares for us, dearly. We are free of the burden of the law and free to obey its tenents.

How strange is it, then, when we are out in the world, held lovingly by the protection of our God, that we are afraid to use our freedom to serve him. My cat sat on my lap for the duration of our outdoor adventure. I prefer to sit snuggly in God's lap, instead of venturing out into His world.

Miss Maggie will learn how to explore the backyard while on a leash. She will get used to the hug of the harness and the limits of her range. I suspect she will even learn how to explore without getting tangled around the table and chairs.

May her courage serve to encourage me to get out of my Father's lap and venture into His world; I am in the harness of God's love and tethered to the blessing of His law, all while being showered in His grace. It's time to get moving.

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man, in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the sinful nature but according to the Spirit. Romans 8:1-4

The Blessing of Trust

The phone call left me with a worrisome heart. I turned to Paul and informed him that the church treasurer was coming to visit. I was one of two teachers at this lovely country church school and I knew that especially for a female church worker, a visit from an official of the church was not likely to be a good thing.

As he walked up to our door I noticed he was not dressed as a farmer; he was in a suit and tie and a concerned look on his face. I searched my brain for what I might have done or said to cause that concern and then welcomed him in.

As it turns out he was going over the records of tithing and noticed that Paul and I were among the church families that gave the most for the previous year. Out of concern for the fact that he knew Paul was out of work and starting school, and because he was well aware of my income, he wanted to encourage us to tithe less.

Yes, you read that correctly; the church treasurer was encouraging us to give less money to the church.

I heaved a heavy sigh of relief and thanked him for his gracious concern. But, Paul and I did not change our giving habits.

You see, I married a tither. My faith in this area has always been weak. I want proof that God will take care of me before I step into the arena of risk taking. But for Paul, this issue has never been worthy of discussion. He remembers a professor preaching at our childhood church. This preacher leaned over the pulpit and shouted: "God doesn't NEED your PENNIES. He could write the Gospel in letters of fire across the sky." Both the words and the shouting made quite an impression on him! God has made it easy for me to give in to the directive to tithe, and in that process, something interesting has happened. Through word sacrament and the nurturing work of the Spirit, my ability to trust God has increased. My faith has grown.

Now, a bit of a warning is necessary, here. This is not a formula for successful trust development. God does not say first you tithe and then I will bless you.

The blessings God bestows on us have everything to do with Him and nothing to do with us.

Because of His powerful all encompassing agape love, God has blessings already planned for us. He does not wait for evidence of worthiness. He knows we are not worthy of these blessings but extends them because of the worthiness of His Son.

The blessings are there, but we often do not realize them because we prefer to stay in our own little worlds where we believe in our false sense of control. Accepting the blessing of God's provision, means we trust enough to let God be in control.

The blessings are there; so often we walk right by them with our heads bowed in our own worry and grief.

I have always worried about money issues. I usually blame the fact that I am a first born in a family that struggled financially due to medical bills. The truth is I am a sinner in a sinful world. When God used Paul to teach me to tithe, the trust came slowly. I remember weeks of eating only government issue cheese and those cute little pullet eggs. I remember checking the gauge on the propane tank and wondering if we would have enough to heat the house until the next paycheck. I remember worrying and I remember God providing.

Trust came slowly for me and I still struggle on that journey; yet I can see how God has worked in my heart. Leaving teaching and enrolling in graduate school has been a huge change that brought with it many, many risks. Some of those risks are financial and that is where my faith is still at its weakest; and yet God still provides. I believe that if God had not led me to tithe, and used that to help develop trust, I would not be enjoying this blessing, now.

He doesn't wait until I trust first, to bless me. He just takes me by the hand and brings me along. The blessings are there, the Spirit stands ready. I just need to lift my head from my own worries and look up to see what is set out before me on the table of blessings. By providing me with the opportunity to tithe and by caring for me through met needs, forgiveness and the nourishment of His word, God brought me to a place where I could trust Him for bigger things. I have a long way to go in terms of trusting. I know I won't ever get there, this side of heaven. However, I am grateful for the opportunity to tithe; not only because of the blessings of what is done with that money, but also because of the blessing tithing brings to my heart.

God doesn't need our paltry change. He doesn't need our money. Instead, He knows we need to give. He knows we need to trust Him for all things. He knows we need to look up, away from our worries and into the face of His blessings.

Let your steadfast love, O LORD, be upon us, even as we hope in you. Psalm 33:22

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Good Books

This has been a huge math semester. I spend more time in the computer lab than in the library and that is less than comfortable for me. A week or so ago, one of the professors suggested a book for me to read. I think he is a bit surprised that I took up that suggestion when the book is not required for anything. I am just so desperate to hold a book in my hands; especially one that relegates numbers to where they belong—to the corner of the page. The book I am reading is on friendship and peer culture in the early years. It is a report on research done by a sociologist who spent a year watching children in a pre-school. It sounds a bit creepy by today's standards and phobias but it was a new approach at the time. Who would have thought you could learn more about kids by watching them where they work and play instead of theorizing about them in a lab on campus? Go figure!

The book is pages and pages of dialog of children playing interspersed with the author's observations. He identified three play themes that were a foundation for most play demonstrated by the children: 1. lost/found 2. danger/rescue and 3. death/rebirth.

Lost and found games can be formal such as "Hide and Go Seek" or just part of an on-going routine: "Teacher, we are looking for the magic fairy, have you seen her?" Lost and found games have safe suspense and predictable joy, when whatever one is looking for is found.

Danger and rescue games up the ante just a bit. While still carefully orchestrated they involve a higher level of suspense as well as a higher level of relief and joy at their conclusion. "Okay, you are caught in the building that is on fire and I am going to rescue you. Remember to scream."

Death and rebirth games are just as common but not always as noticeable. They can happen in the midst of a lost and found or danger and rescue game. An observer will notice this type of play when a character is "dead" but can still talk and direct the game. Or if a character dies but is alive again the next time a game is played.

It is fascinating to watch children play and to see how many versions of these three games they can create. It is important to remember that children do not play these games randomly. They play them for a purpose. Just as a child who wants to hear the same story over and over, is learning something in the process of that story, a child who plays the same game over and over is learning, too. These young minds are grappling with ancient issues.

I had a class that struggled with the realization that a classmate lost a parent to death. They played the same death/rebirth game for the rest of the school year. They played it happily as if it was a game of tag. I watched and prayed over them, and developed a better understanding of how God was helping them.

The author of the study was interested in young children and play but I see these same themes in the lives of adults. Just like in the Margaret Wise Brown book "The Runaway Bunny" we want to know that no matter how far away we run from those who love us, we will always be found and welcomed home. Just as in Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak. We want the thrill of exploring our wild side but we want to know we are always safe. And just like Eric Carle's The Very Hungry Caterpillar we want to know that there is a different life waiting us when this one is finished.

Are we really surprised by this?

Our children are working, in their own way, to understand the same things we worry over as adults. We want to know that no matter how far we stray, God will come looking for us and will bring us back to Him.

Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Does he not leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? Luke 15:4

We want to know that no matter what danger we face we will be safe in His arms:

I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of My hand. John 10:28

And we want to be assured that the life we currently live is not all there is. We want to be transformed in heaven and here on earth:

For this Son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found. Luke 15: 24

From before we were born, from our early childhood years until now and into the future, God knows our needs and meets them perfectly.

If the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. John 8:36

I think I need to go back to my favorite book and read those stories again.

Will this be on the test?

I am writing a test for my study skills class. It is 44 questions with both multiple choice and short answer. It is eight pages long and there are two forms. This is a big project for me as I wrote very few tests during my tenure as an early childhood teacher. Last year, when I taught an undergrad measurements class, instead of giving a final I asked the students to write their own.

What better way to find out if students in a class, teaching test writing, have learned how to write tests?

I am not a big fan of tests and because of my graduate level educational measurement class I know all too well why high stakes testing is a bad idea; a very bad idea, indeed.

I could tell some stories that would make your number two pencil curl.

My professor in the measurement class just gave us a stinker of a test. It was a take home test that took every spare minute over three days. When I finally finished the last question I realized that question, alone, took me an hour and a half. When he told us about the test, the professor bragged that no one had ever gotten 100% on the test before.

Really??? Srlsy?? No one?

So what does that say about the test and/or his teaching? I had the nerve to ask him what the reliability coefficient was on this test and he turned a bit pale and mumbled something I couldn't quite get down into my notes.

Dear Lord, grab my tongue and hold it down.

When I gave tests to elementary students, the test covered what we had studied and I considered it a good thing when all, or at least most of the students did a good job. Now, when I write test questions, I am supposed to write them with seductive distracters so they discriminate between poor learners and good learners. In other words, I should want some of my students to fail.

Hmmm, sounds like an excuse for poor teaching to me. But, then, what do I know? I am just a graduate student.

The issues surrounding testing in education are complicated and contentious. Are tests being used correctly? Are they telling us what we need to know? How much learning time can we afford to sacrifice to make room for more testing? Are tests really making education better, or just more competitive? Do test prepare students for the real world?

God's view of testing is very different. He allowed Job to be tested and then stepped in and gave Job the answers. God does not use testing to weed out the unbelievers from the believers; He will do that on the last day. God uses testing to teach and to bring about growth.

When our faith is tested, we become acutely aware of our need for answers. Although it is a good thing to participate in a study group; we can't prepare for our trials and tribulations. And although it is a good thing to study God's word; we can't study enough to be ready for a test of faith. We need our Teacher to give us the answers. We need our Teacher to complete the test for us.

And in that process we learn and grow in our faith.

It is not God's desire for us to fail. In fact it is His command that we succeed, and do so perfectly. God is the instructor who knows that we are not up to the task. We do not compete with each other; we compete with our own sinful nature. We fail at the test, we learn to trust in Him, and at the end of our semester the grade is reported as 100%.

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. James 1:2-3

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. Romans 5: 3-5

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Orchid Children

Paul pointed me toward a great article in the December 2009 issue of The Atlantic: Orchid Children, by David Dobbs. The article is his explanation of a recent collaboration between geneticists and psychologists. The basic point of the article is that most of us are dandelions; we grow just fine wherever we are planted. We just need the basics to bloom and grow. Some of us, though, are orchids; we need special care or we will wilt and die. The good news about orchids is that with a bit of tender loving care, they grow into exceptional people.

It seems that the same gene variants that can make us susceptible to depression, anxiety ADHD, risk taking, anti-social or aggressive behaviors, can lead to highly creative and successful lives, if the right care is given. Whether or not the genes will lead to depression or creativity has a great deal to do with the child's life experiences and what care was received during formative years. In the past we have only seen the behaviors of depression, aggression, etc. as being a deficit; we have never seen them as being potential for greatness. Yet, the evidence is strong. I can think of several highly successful people who didn't adjust well to their school environments (Einstein, Edison, F.L.Wright) and many many creative people who suffered from depression (Lincoln, Dickenson, Van Gogh) or other mental illnesses. We have assumed that these negative behaviors, or conditions, are only negative, but maybe they are the reason for the success of these individuals.

The article describes a research program that studied toddlers who had issues. They studied children who had high levels of externalizing behaviors. "Externalizing behaviors" is nothing but a fancy way of saying these kids whined, and kicked and refused to obey. It is known that toddlers with especially high rates of these behaviors are more likely to have difficulties later on. The research program showed that when the mothers of these children were given specific techniques to use and training to detect when a fit was about to happen, that when they applied these techniques these children made huge progress in being able to self soothe and stay calm. The mothers found that if they persisted they could teach their children to enjoy activities, like reading a book together, which previously was deemed impossible. It took a lot of work, perseverance, patience and love, but the result was these orchid children bloomed.

Apparently you can undergo a genetic test to see if you carry these specific genetic alleles. I don't think this is a good idea as I believe all children should be raised as orchid children. In fact, I believe in God's eyes we all are orchid children. We carry the gene for sin. We follow our own whims and lead ourselves into trouble. We persist in trying to get our own way even in the face of God's wisdom and plan. We are all orchid toddlers, whining and kicking and screaming through the trials and tribulations we cause ourselves. Others lose patience with us, we even lose patience with ourselves, but God perseveres.

God's love covers a multitude of sins. He applies law as we need it but never hesitates to shower us with Grace. He knows that alone we have no potential to do anything right, much less anything exceptional. He knows that through the redemptive work of the Son and through the faith giving power of the spirit, we are exceptional in His eyes.

A parent's love for a difficult child covers a multitude of behaviors. When that love is correctly and gently applied, God creates a change. My husband, Paul, expressed this beautifully in his song "Love Covers a Multitude."

Remember today, that we are simultaneous dandelions and orchids. God can create growth wherever He plants you. You are forgiven and loved. You are exceptional.

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms.

I Peter 4: 8-10

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

I Corinthians 13:7

Green Eggs and Homer

When I was little I used to wonder if my Uncle Homer was Dr. Seuss. I suppose it was the last name of Eggers and the whole green eggs and ham reference, but, it was probably a little bit due to the fact that Uncle Homer was just as I imagined Dr. Seuss would be like: kind, loving, funny, interested in kids as if we were real people, and plenty goofy when the situation called for it. Now, that I am old enough to know better, I still suspect that Uncle Homer was an even better Dr. Seuss than the real one.

When I went to family reunions I would always look for Uncle Homer. Now don't get me wrong, I loved my pastor uncles and wonderful aunts; I admired their vocabularies, their discussions, and many accomplishments but, you see, Uncle Homer was interested in me. He would put his hand on my shoulder and ask me. . .really ask me, how I was doing. Because of the wonders of Grace and Homer, I very much wanted to be like their children, Tom, Susan and Nancy, when I grew up. I hope I am, at least a little bit.

When I think of Uncle Homer and Aunt Grace I am reminded of a particular characteristic: humility. Homer and Grace did not boast. This was not a surprise because those of us who teach know that the people who brag are usually the ones who are least secure. They feel the need to remind people of their importance. They worry they might be deemed insignificant if others aren't hearing about them or imitating them. No, Homer and Grace did not boast. Still, they didn't put themselves down, either. The folks who criticize themselves in front of others aren't any more humble than the people who boast. It doesn't really matter if you are bragging or dragging, you are still thinking about yourself. Homer and Grace showed humility because they didn't feel the need to be thinking about themselves. They were too busy thinking about others. They were too busy loving others. They were too busy doing the work God set before them. In this way they showed us what it means to be a servant.

A few days ago, Jesus came, put his hand on Homer's shoulder and took him home to heaven. I am imagining him holding Grace's hand and looking into the eyes of his Savior. I know that both Homer and Grace went to heaven very proud of their children. I know both Homer and Grace will be missed. And, because of their humility and love, I know my Savior's love a little bit better.

Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Romans 12:10

However, as it is written: "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him"— but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. I Corinthians 2:9-10

Doors, cats and blessings

Our cat, bless her heart, cannot abide a closed door. She may avoid my office all morning, but as soon as I shut the door I see her paw poking around underneath. She is especially intrigued by the bathroom. Most cats that have taken up residence with our family have learned to avoid the bathroom. While there are rolls of toilet paper presenting interesting entertainment possibilities there are also several serious water hazards to contend with.

This cat, however, cannot walk past the bathroom door without inspecting the other side. She is especially curious if the door is open just a crack.

Can't. . . .walk . . . .past . . . .must . . . .get . . . .in. . . .somehow. . .mew.

We have noticed that she has not been able to figure out the door for this particular room. All she has to do is lean on the door, ever so slightly and the wonders of the bathroom are hers for the taking. All she has to do is lean on the door, yet she still reaches her paw around the corner in order to gain entrance, which only serves to move the door toward closing. It is a curious game.

Apparently, in this house anyway, cats and their owners are easily entertained.

I wonder how often I am that cat trying in vain to open one of God's doors for my life? The door is open; all I have to do is walk in. Still, I struggle with the door, certain that there is some trick I must perform to gain entrance to my God and His gifts for me.

Hmmm, maybe if I try my other paw? Nope, that's not working either.

Grace, forgiveness, mercy, unconditional love, they all sound too good to be true. Is God really going to give me all these things without my earning them first? Has He really gone to the trouble of leaving the door ajar so I have complete and easy access? My faith knows the answer is a resounding yes. Yes, God loves me no matter what I do, or what I neglect to do. Yes, Jesus reaches out with His nail scarred hands to forgive me over and over and over again. Yes, His Spirit lives in me, nurturing my faith and reminding me of His grace and mercy. My faith says yes.

But my pride says no. No, I need to do good works to stay on the right side of that door. No, I need to worry over my own troubles because God is too busy to bother with me. No, I need to complete a list of activities that will result in advanced Biblical understanding and superior prayer performance. My pride says no, no, no, because in my pride, I think it really is all about me.

And yet, the door stands ajar; my Savior on the other side with open arms of comfort and love. God's plan for my life progresses even while I waste my time trying to pull at a door that doesn't even need pushing.

Our daughter Anne has walked through one of God's doors. The opportunity to teach at a local Catholic school was presented to her. She spent the previous week getting the room ready and living, breathing, sleeping curriculum. This week the teaching has begun and as her family we are the beneficiaries of many good stories about her students. She is learning how to share God's love while being careful not to step on Catholic toes. She is learning to love her students. She is feeling God's love. I am so very glad she has walked through that door and stepped into the beginning of the ministry God has planned for her.

"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!

Matthew 7: 7-11

I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved and will go in and out and find pasture.

John 10:9

There is so much goodness to be had by leaning on that door and walking in.